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Pre-school development worker Jan Furlong tells how
she spotted a gap in provision
In Leeds today there are over 200 Baby and Toddler groups.
When attending these groups as a Family Support Worker it
became very clear to me that grandparents were not very well
represented. A small amount of grandparents were attending
groups, but this did not compare with the amount of grandparents
looking after children either in a part-time or full-time
capacity. The Grandparents' Association have found that over
60 per cent of childcare provision is provided by grandparents.
Research
When considering setting up any new group, it is
vital to do your research. It is especially important to establish
if there is a need in the local community for the type of
service you want to set up, as this will have a huge impact
on the success and sustainability of the group. With this
in mind, I carried out research into groups for grandparents
over a period of six months.
I decided to talk to as many grandparents who were already
in, or had used provision and asked three questions:
- How did they feel about the group?
- How did they feel on the first day that they attended?
- Did they enjoy attending their group?
What became clear from this survey was that nearly everyone
who had started attending a group had to attend their first
session alone, which some had found very frightening. The
friendliness of the group or the fact that their grandchild
enjoyed attending the group were the main factors that ensured
they continued attending. Many of the grandparents were looking
after grandchildren because their own children felt more secure
leaving them with people they know when they had returned
to work, and in some cases because the parents of the child
did not feel financially able to use other provision.
The grandparents I spoke to knew of other grandparent carers
who have never attended a group because they felt that the
provision would not be for them, especially feeling that the
age factor would make them feel excluded.
For further research, I attended a Grandparents Association
AGM and talked to grandparents of children of all ages. This
was very different from what I had been hearing before - many
of the grandparents who attended the meeting had conflict
within their families. Some were going through legal proceedings
to look after their grandchildren full time, or needed support
because they were now the sole carers of their grandchildren.
Some had become carers for their grandchildren because their
own children had drug dependency problems. I asked about whether
they would find a grandparents' baby and toddler group useful.
Many felt isolated and would appreciate a place they could
attend where they could be with other grandparents and 'talk
like grandparents rather than parents'. I did not receive
a single negative comment against such a group.
Following this, I stopped and spoke to grandparents pushing
pushchairs in the local area, asking them for their views
about provision for grandparent carers. The response was again
very positive.
Issues to consider
Although responses to the idea of grandparents' baby
and toddler groups were positive, my research made it clear
that the geographical location of the group was of the utmost
importance. Many of the respondents said that ideally, a group
would have to be close as they need to use public transport
to attend.
When choosing the best location for a group, I felt it was
vital that it meet the following criteria:
- In a town centre
- In a well populated area
- With good transport links
- In an area where I already had a group running very well
Being in an area near a well-established group offered the
possibility of forming a partnership for their provision to
be used on another day for the grandparents group. I felt
that this was a very important consideration. With this in
mind, I approached the Salvation Army and talked about the
idea of a grandparents group. They were very responsive and
indeed had already noticed that there was a need in this area
as a large number of grandparents were looking after children.
Getting the message out
The biggest problem with the grandparents' group
was, and probably still is, marketing the group. After the
intitial serious marketing push handing out flyers, we were
very reliant upon others marketing the group for us. We found
that some organisations such as health centres, often struggled
with the concept of what the group was about. We placed the
group details in the 'What's on' section of the local newspapers,
but this again failed to explain fully who the group was for
and what services it provided.
In September this year we joined together with the Grandparents'
Association to hold a big celebatory event called The
Big Grr for grandparents and their grandchildren. The
event was part of National Grandparents' Week, and
we used the opportunity to raise the profile of the grandparent
baby and toddler groups and to let people know what services
are available to them. The day was a great success and helped
us to get our full message across.
Success
The success of the group has never really been about
attendance figures. At the most we have had ten grandparents,
falling to just two after nursery intake. However, talking
to the grandparents who attend or have attended, the support
and confidence they have gained through being involved in
the group has been immense.
Most grandparents who attend are part-time carers of their
grandchildren, looking after the grandchildren while their
parents are at work. Most like the group because 'they are
all the same'. It also gives them the opportunity to find
out about dealing with children's behaviour. For the children,
especially those who had never attended anything with other
children present, it has been a great opportunity to gain
confidence with other children.
The grandparents' group is about support and movement and
not being precious about this being the only group they should
be attending. The aim is to give confidence to the child but
also to the grandparent. Most have never attended another
group alone, but have sometimes formed partnerships to attend
another group together. One grandparent left to attend a local
baby and toddler group after encouragement to do so at the
grandparent group.
Since this work started another three groups have been opened
in the area and hopefully another will be opening shortly.
(Under 5, November/December 2006)
Parenting
practices have changed over the generations but the one thing
that has remained constant is the importance of talking, listening
and playing with children. Grandparents are ideally placed
to spend quality time interacting with children as most are
free from the responsibility and stresses of parenting.
In
a recent Yours survey seventy percent of respondents
said that being a grandparent was better than being a parent
because of the time they had to enjoy their grandchildren,
without the financial responsibility.1
Talk
To Your Baby has looked into the increasingly important role
that grandparents play in British families, and the impact
they have on family communication and children's social development.
Please read our report below. References are listed at the
end.
Grandparents are central to family life in the UK. Three-quarters
of them are involved in their grandchildren's lives and contribute
to their upbringing.2 This is largely due to the fact that
more mothers work and the high cost of childcare.3
Grandparents and childcare
The Daycare Trust states that seventy percent of employed
women with dependent children use informal childcare by friends,
neighbours or family for all or part of their childcare.
Each week a quarter of families with children under-15 use
a grandparent to provide childcare (around 1,740,000 families).
Where grandparents provide childcare they do so for an average
of 15.9 hours per week. Most grandparents childmind without
payment. The Daycare Trust estimates that the value of this
informal service is over £1 billion a year.
A Scottish Executive survey suggests that affordability is
the key reason why parents arrange for their children to be
looked after by grandparents. But the survey also reveals
that the issue of trust is a more important reason for parents
to select grandparents as childminders, followed closely by
their wish to have a childminder who will be affectionate
towards their children.5
In the last few years grandparents have attracted growing
interest from UK researchers, perhaps partly because the government
has acknowledged the valuable role that grandparents play
in supporting parents and children and providing lasting stability.6
Grandparents who wish to be paid for looking after children
can now be registered as childminders and get support and
training in their role as a professional child carer.
Parenting classes aimed at grandparents are becoming more
common. The Glasgow Southern General Hospital runs antenatal
classes for grandparents to teach them the importance of breastfeeding,
as a lot of grannies used to bottle feed. Other topics include
cot-death prevention, car safety and how to spot post-natal
depression in a new mum. The monthly classes are well attended.
But understandably, not all grandparents are willing and
enthusiastic childminders. There is evidence to suggest that
grandparents, particularly those with a partner who is unwell,
find the childcare role difficult. Many find it hard to say
no because they have an emotional investment in their families.
They are aware of the high cost of childcare, but they are
taking on children at a time when they are ready to take it
easy.8
The Daycare Trust believes that the availability of grandparents
and other informal carers is likely to decrease as families
live at greater distances from each other due to careers,
divorce or separation, and as more grandparents continue to
work.9
The modern grandparent
Todays grandmother is a modern woman. She is likely to be
a career woman, and if not, busy with a myriad of chosen activities.10
This is hardly surprising given that the average age of grandparents
in the UK is 54.
The 21st Century Gran Survey for Yours magazine found
that the 21st century granny - a character composed from 2,000
replies - is as far from the traditional scone-making biddy
with a steel grey hairbun as any image-maker could contrive.
Feeling, on average, 21 years younger than her actual age,
the modern grandmother is adept at picking up modern technology
- mobile phones and computers are a must. Half of all respondents
had recently been to a theme park, 15% said they always try
out new roller-coasters and 7% like to go skinny-dipping.
A fifth said they have an alcoholic drink every day, 94% like
dressing up regularly for a night out, and half are on the
lookout for love.11
As fathers have assumed new roles, grandfathers also have
new images. They are aware that being a nurturing man is considered
a positive virtue, and take the time to be affectionate and
loving. A retired grandfather expressed the sentiment of many
when he said, "When my children were growing up I was so busy
making a living I had very little time for them. Now my biggest
joy is being with my grandchildren. Maybe I'm trying to make
up for what I didn't do before."12
A study by the Newcastle Family Studies Centre concluded
that grandparents are viewed by grandchildren as fun companions
nowadays, rather than the authoritarian figures of the past.
Many children confide in their grandparents if they have problems.13
Grandparents and family communication
Research by the Newcastle Family Studies Centre suggests
that interpersonal communication is fundamentally important
to a successful ageing process. The grandparents in this study
said repeatedly that what mattered to them was being able
to chat to someone ("anyone who'll listen") about anything
and everything - the ordinary, everyday things. It was clear
that many of these grandparents were the ones who maintained
the family networks, who made it their business to keep in
touch.14
An important part of staying in touch and keeping up with
the family news and gossip is day-to-day chit-chat. Participants
in the Newcastle study described chatting as an essential
part of family life. Most grandparents seemed happy to talk
both about trivia and about more serious topics such as money
and sex. Although some (mainly grandfathers) appeared to be
more comfortable when they were reminiscing about the past,
the majority were well able to talk about 'modern' things
with their children and grandchildren.
More than one in five teenagers had talked to a grandparent
about personal problems - a higher proportion than had talked
to parents, teachers or siblings about such problems. Grandparents,
particularly grandmothers, are frequently used as confidantes.
They represent a listening ear for grandchildren, as they
are often intensely interested in hearing about their activities
and concerns.
Grandparents and child development
Spurred by the excitement of the birth of a new family member,
grandparents tend to visit more often after the birth, and
to help in taking care of the new family.15 A survey conducted
by Cerlin and Furstenburg found that while 42 percent of grandparents
interviewed said they enjoyed all ages of their grandchildren
equally, aong those grandparents indicating a preference,
24 percent "overwhelmingly favoured" 0 to 4-year-olds.16
Studies of infants' behaviour with their mother and grandmother
indicate that grandmothers can serve as attachment figures
and can play an important role in the young child's social
development.17 A grandparent is likely to love a child almost
as much as the parent and, given the chance, a child will
develop a close bond with the relative which will enrich both
their lives.
Unlike many parents who are required to work long unsociable
hours - leaving less time for their children - retired grandparents
can give their grandchildren quality time. By playing, talking
and listening to their young grandchildren, grandparents play
a vital role in helping to develop their language and communication
skills.
Grandparents are a tremendous resource for their grandchildren.
They can share their past through stories and songs - an important
step towards literacy - and help children discover their roots
by sharing a native language or favourite family recipe.
British families are changing rapidly but grandparents are
a constant source of support both to their own children and
their grandchildren. They are often "the glue that helps to
bind a family together."18
References
1. The 21st Century Gran Survey, Yours magazine,
July 2004
2. Age Concern poll, July 2003.
3. Micheal Anderson, Jill Tunaley, Janet Walker (2000) Relatively
speaking: communication in families, University of Newcastle's
Family Studies Centre
4. Pamela Meadows and Volterra Consulting (2004) The economic
contributions of older people
5. Scottish Executive Survey, July 2004
6. Grandparents Plus www.grandparentsplus.org.uk
7. The Guardian, 7 July 2004
8. Micheal Anderson, Jill Tunaley, Janet Walker (2000) Relatively
speaking: communication in families, University of Newcastle's
Family Studies Centre
9. The Daycare Trust, October 2003
10. Bernice Weissvourd, M.A. (1996) There will always be
lullabies: enduring connections between grandparents and young
children, Zero to Three journal, February/March, vol.
16:4
11. The Guardian, 1 July 2004
12. Bernice Weissvourd, M.A. (1996) There will always be
lullabies: enduring connections between grandparents and young
children, Zero to Three journal, February/March, vol.
16:4
13. Micheal Anderson, Jill Tunaley, Janet Walker (2000) Relatively
speaking: communication in families, University of Newcastle's
Family Studies Centre
14. As above
15. Bernice Weissvourd, M.A. (1996) There will always be
lullabies: enduring connections between grandparents and young
children, Zero to Three journal, February/March, vol.
16:4
16. Cherlin and fustenburg (1988) The New American Grandparent,
Harvard Books
17. Myers G.J, Jarvis P.A. and Creasey, G.L (1987) Infants'
behaviour with their mothers and grandmothers, Infant Behaviour
Development, 10, 24-36
18. Age Concern, 2004
Grandparent-toddler groups initiative.
Launched by The Grandparents' Association in 2001, the grandparent
toddler groups initiative aims to provide up to two hours
a week social contact for children under three and their carers.
They are similar to parent-toddler groups, except that they
cater for senior carers rather than parents. The groups are
intended partly to combat loneliness amongst the carers, who
may feel that they are cut off from their peer groups when
they are with young children, but also to reduce isolation
amongst the grandchildren being cared for. For more information
visit www.grandparents-association.org.uk
The Basic Skills Agency produces the
Learning with Grandparents pack as part of its Developing
Effective Practice programme. Learning with Grandparents includes
the introductory leaflet, It doesn't
take much to stay in touch; the Learning
with Grandparents good practice guide; a postcard pack,
including postcards that children can send to their grandparents;
The Things to do when you're apart
booklet; and A jargon-busting
ABC of primary schools. For more information visit www.basic-skills.co.uk/resources/
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