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Parent forum for dummies

24 May 2004

The Times, 24 May 2004

Problem
" I need a foolproof way to persuade my stubborn daughter, 4, to give up her dummy."

Advice
"Announce that she is now at an age to say goodbye to the dummy, because she is a big girl and ready for a pink handbag, special shoes, Barbie, a little diary - or any present that gives her the incentive to reach the next stage. Ask your daughter to choose a day when she is going to put her dummy in the bin - and have the present ready. At the time it seems like a big deal; she will have forgotten it before she has got the wrapping off the gift."
Stephanie Calman, mother and founder www.badmothersclub.co.uk

"Engage your daughter in playing with dolls, one of which uses a dummy. You can be the voices of the dolls, with one doll discouraging the other from using a dummy. During these role-play activities, do not make fun but dwell on how grown-up the doll looks without the dummy. You could enlist the help of your daughter's teacher in reinforcing this during circle time at nursery. Nothing is foolproof but rest assured that she will grow out of it, if only because she realises that her friends don't use dummies. Peer pressure is a powerful thing."
Kathy Sumpter, mother and early years teacher, Bishop's Stortford

"The answer is: don't try. I forced my equally stubborn four-year-old to give up the dummy and he sucked everything else available: the cord of his jacket, the collar of his shirt, the strap of his bag and the neckline of his T-shirt. In fact, I still catch him sucking the T-shirt occasionally and he is 12 now. My daughter, on the other hand, reduced her dummy dependency gradually, as she became embarrassed if anyone else saw her with it, and so used it only for bedtimes. She voluntarily binned her dummy the night before she started school and has never sucked anything else."
Eileen McCallum, mother, Glasgow

Tags: Talk To Your Baby